Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Educational Training on Cultural Diversity

Had one of my Lucy Ricardo moments---I believe I took my daughter to a brothel on Monday.

On Monday Amira and I had lots of things to do after she got of out school, so I was strategizing the best way to do as many tasks as possible in the shortest time period.

I picked her up for school and told her of our errands (manicure, hair cuts, library run, groceries, etc.). I told her I spotted a place not far from her school where they were advertising inexpensive haircuts as well as offer manicure services too. I was excited about finding a place that was as they say “a one stop shopping” spot.

We pulled into this driveway and proceeded towards the salon which advertised on its door “a full service salon” (i.e., hair, nails, facials, massage).

We walked in the front door of this building which by the way had blocked off windows for seeing in which whould have been my first clue, but wasn’t, and was greeting by a beautiful Asian woman. She seemed surprised to see us but greeted us warmly nontheless (should have been clue #2—the surprised look, but wasn’t). I explained to her what I needed done for Amira and I and she tucked her head behind a curtain, mumbled some words in a foreign language and then reappeared. She exclaimed that the lady behind the curtain would gladly help me. Amira and I walke through the curtain to a small manicure/pedicure room and was greeted by another beautiful Asian woman. Upon telling us to sit, they were digging the nail equipment out of the drawers and storage area (again another clue something wasn’t what it seemed to be, but oh no…..I’m too focused on “one stop shopping and time management”).

Another beautiful Asian woman comes into the room to retrieve Amira as she has stated she’ll be trimming her hair. Out the curtain Amira goes to an area where a hair station is set up (thankfully I can see her from this vantage point). While the lady is manicuring my nails and not necessarily doing a great job, I realize its been quite awhile since Amira went to get her hair trimmed, and found this odd since it was just the ends of her hair that needed trimming. Finally Amira comes back into the room and literally it looked like not one hair had been cut. So much so that I actually ask Amira right then and there, did they cut your hair? She assures me they did and she’s satisfied with it.

Finally beauty #2 is done with my bloody stump fingers. I remind beauty #1 that I needed to still get my hair trimmed. She tells me the price and now I’m getting frustrated because it seems like the fees are being made up as we go. DUH, of course they were, but I’m still freakin’ clueless.

Beauty #1 takes me to the hair station and at this point begins to tell me, “oh you hair so prrretty, and so fashion”. In my bewilderment I see now an older Asian woman peaking out from behind the corner of another room and then quickly ducking back in. Me, thinking---“what the hell?” (At this point there's so many clues that I'm even embarassed to acknowledge.) The lightbulb which is ever so dim in my head is now finally fighting to flicker on.

I ask beauty #1, “so do you guys do massage here too?” Now normally in a hair or nail establishment operated by Asians they want to sell you on ever service---in fact almost pushing them all on you to try, but not in this case. Beauty #1 says, “uh yes – you like your hair, it’s soooooo prrrretty”.

Finally the ordeal is over and Amira and I leave. On to our next errand---to which I explain to Amira we’ll never be going back there---it was a weird place. She said, “yeah, it was. The lady who spoke English, I think she was the owner, she was teaching the other lady how to cut my hair when I was in there.”

As we arrived at our next destination Amira tells me that she forget her coat at that place we were just at. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr now I have to go back and get her coat. As I go back in the front door Beauty #1 quickly came to the front door and got wide eyed when she saw me. I told her we left my daughter’s coat there and she quickly scrampled for it. While doing so, I walked a little further in the entry way and what did I see……..two gentlemen sitting in the hair station chairs. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, just saying…….something wasn’t what it appeared.

I'll have to chalk it up to educational training on cultural diversity.
Good grief Charlie Brown!

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Time Management

Learning to not waste your own time.

It is so easy to stand in your own way, to distract yourself from changing, growing or transforming from what was to what will be. Even in the mist of your fears, sadness, depression, idleness, restlessness, boredom, laziness it is so easy to get distracted. It is so easy to justify spending more time on the computer, texting on our cells, or whatever we do to kill precious moments of our own time. Yes, yes, yes, of course we can justify it, but why is it necessary? What are we avoiding?

Give yourself and your life an earnest look over and ask yourself, “Am I wasting my own time? Am I standing in my own way of achieving whatever goal(s) I’ve pondered for myself?” If the answer is “yes”, then consider new time management. Stop wasting your own precious time.

I give this little discussion to myself, really. For I know and have known for sometime that I stand in my own way of achieving certain goals. Not to say I haven't been successful because that wouldn't be a true statement. I've achieved a great number of goals for myself.....goals I never truly imagined would come true, but over my lifetime have indeed come to fruition. However, when I look at these achievements, I realize they are somewhat distant from my personal being. That is except for one, and that is being a mother. All other achievements are a distant from thy personal being, which may explain why they were achievable. A somewhat non-detachment, I suppose, to them.

“So what am I blathering about”, I ask myself. I’m blathering about my willingness to keep a distance between myself and whoever my life partner may be. For far too many years, I’ve built walls, barricades, hell even a fortress around my heart out of fear of being hurt, betrayed and fooled again. My pride could not stand the idea of that ever happening again. Moreover, I never wanted my daughter to see that vulnerable side of myself with a man.

However, even in the mist of this battle brocade I was shrouding over myself, I still felt the whimperings and longings of a cohesive partnership.

I know the price for this to happen. I know I must be willing to lower some of the shields I have in place in order to show the universe I am willing and wanting to proceed in achieving such a partnership.

Am I scared? Yes! Am I willing to stop wasting my time and consider the possibilities? Yes! Will I succeed? Time will tell.